The Power of “Pray-oritization” in Setting God-Centered Priorities
Prioritization can feel like a complicated task when there’s so much going on. It’s defined as the process of ranking goals, action items, or tasks according to their relative importance or urgency. It’s about doing things in the right order. But if everything feels urgent, how do we identify our real priorities? Where have we gotten this wrong?
Here are some common things I’ve heard people say, including myself:
I feel so scattered.
I have so much to do and so little time.
I don’t even know where to begin!
I’m so busy.
I can’t seem to get anything done.
I’m always in crisis mode.
I don’t have time for what I want to do.
I get easily distracted.
The emotions we feel when saying these things are very real, but they also reveal the problem. What’s common in all these statements is a scarcity mindset. I briefly cover what this mindset looks like in a previous blog, which you may want to read or re-read later: Embracing Our Inner Martha and Mary: Moving from Perfectionism to Presence. The idea is that we have this pattern of thinking, influenced by past experiences, that makes us believe there is never enough. But the truth is, God has always given us more than enough. We have exactly the right amount of time and creativity to get what is needed completed—it’s really just how we look at it.
Now, back to setting priorities. What I’ve learned from many past mistakes regarding how I spent my time is that prioritization begins with "pray-oritization." In deep, consistent, heartfelt prayer, we enter into rhythm with God. If priorities are about creating a sense of order, then they have to align with God’s order. He has created order, rhythm, and goodness in all things, but we often operate against that, especially after the fall of man in Genesis. Once sin entered the world, everything became scattered and divided. I remember Bishop Barron sharing at World Youth Day in Poland 2016 that the Greek word diabolos means "one who divides and scatters." We see this in our society—everything is upside down, not in harmony or order. We get distracted by shiny objects or choose things without real direction toward the true purpose God created us for. So, we need prayer, including Mass and Confession, to sync with the rhythm of God. Prayer is our pulse, and the more frequently we do it, the more the kingdom of God becomes our reality.
So, prayer is our top priority. It is central to everything we do, and through it, God pours grace into all that we do. Next, we need to understand the right order that God intended for our lives. We know that God worked, created the universe and mankind, and then He rested. Therefore, our lives should follow a rhythm of work and rest. If we are not resting in God, allowing Him to fill us to do the work He calls us to, where are we giving from? How can we bear fruit if we’re trying to water the plant from an empty watering can? Why should we wait until we get sick to take time to rest? We need to care for our bodies, minds, and souls on a rhythmic basis so that we can give from what is holy and from our best. If God worked for six days and rested on the seventh, we are called to do the same. Learn to rest together as a family, have screen-free days, and go out to enjoy the gifts of God.
Now that we know rest is a high priority, what do we do with the work part? When I speak of work, I mean everything we are called to do, including our responsibilities in our home, state in life, and profession. The second account of creation in the Bible tells the story of God designing Adam. God said, "It is not good for man to be alone," so He made a helper from Adam’s rib, who we know as Eve. “Therefore, a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). If you are married, this tells us that your spouse is your priority after God, above everything else. If you have children, the love between you and your spouse will flow into your children. I learned that in the Holy Trinity, the love between the Father and the Son is the Holy Spirit. In marriage, the love between husband and wife is God; therefore, when you love each other well, you give God to your children. So, caring for our domestic church—father, mother, and children—is a top priority because this builds up society. From there, we can minister to our community with our family.
God doesn’t neglect those who may not have spouses or children or who are in challenging situations and relationships. He delights in His children and meets you where you are. God wants us to focus primarily on Him and the mission and personal vocation for which He created us. He calls us to become the saints of our time, responding to the needs of the present moment. You were born for such a time as this (Esther 4:14). Inspired by St. Therese, we are called to do the ordinary extraordinarily; even the simple tasks of cleaning our home or helping our neighbor should be done with great love. In each moment, even the simplest ones, we learn to be holy.
God desires that we live from our excellence—our unique genius. But to do that, we need to be knowledgeable and confident in who we are and what we were designed for. We must identify what we value most, our non-negotiables, our strengths, and our vision and direction. We must remember that we are still human and cannot rely solely on ourselves to learn this. We need to seek wisdom and counsel from formed Catholics, spiritual directors, and coaches to refine these areas so that they align with God’s will. When we understand these key aspects of ourselves and lay out the vision we are moving toward, it gives us parameters to focus on. This is where we learn to set boundaries and put order into how we do things so we can move toward our end goal. We are not called to do everything, help everyone, or fix everyone; we are not the Savior—Jesus is. We are called to focus on the specific mission God has for us. A friend shared with me that each individual is created as the solution to a particular problem in the world. If we try to fix all the problems, we won’t be able to steward God’s purpose within us. We always have the choice to follow the wide path and say yes to every request or to choose the narrow path that leads to what God created us for.
Matthew 7:13-14: “Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it.”
There’s more to cover on this topic, and it would be difficult to address every specific circumstance in one sitting. That would require a full curriculum and individual coaching sessions. However, the most important thing is that we need to order our lives according to God’s intentions, not just by our human understanding but by His. We’ll find ourselves in rhythm with God, and our lives will reflect it. So, the next time you feel overwhelmed and can’t figure out what to do, remember to pause, breathe in the breath God gave us, and say, "I am enough. God has given me enough, and He will lay the path before me, guiding me in doing the work He calls me to.” Give yourself the space to make room for creativity with God as you prioritize your tasks. You will naturally discover the one thing you can do first; do it, and then you'll find yourself moving toward where you hoped to be.
question to ponder
How are you called to reorder and “pray-oritize” your life?
Coaching Testimonial:
“Roxsan is definitely a beautiful soul to walk with on my own journey to personal discovery and wholeness. Over the past several months, she has helped me identify areas in my life that require stretching, while gently challenging me to reflect on the barriers to growth and healing. Roxsan’s approach is inspiring me to communicate not only with myself but also with my family as we navigate through life together, making tough decisions and moving towards a healthier mindset and lifestyle. I’m so grateful for her work, and I know so many others will benefit because of her commitment to honor each person’s identity as a child of God.”
